My colon cancer

I'm writing this mainly for my own record but also for those who may have an interest in how things are going and perhaps don't want to ask.

I should probably start by saying how I feel about my cancer.  I don't think "Why me?"  I honestly believe it's just one of those things.  I've never smoked, have been totally abstinent from alcohol for four years, eat well and run three times a week.  So not exactly a bowel cancer candidate.  However I was lucky to recently sit next to an eminent Professor at a Uni dinner who said that whilst lifestyle factors raise one's risk, cancer is by it's very nature genetic.  In other words, I don't feel I did anything to 'deserve' it or bring it on myself or in reality could have done much to prevent it.

This brings me onto the subject of the language used around cancer.  I don't feel like a victim or a survivor or that I'm battling something.  This is totally out of my control.  However if other people gain strength from referring to themselves in that way, then that's fine by me.  We cope with this in the best way we can.  For me that means being open and honest and as matter of fact as I can be about my cancer and how I'm feeling.  It means trying to keep my life as normal as possible during my treatment.  How realistic that is will unfold over the next six months and as today is the first day of my Chemotherapy treatment.   How things have gone today will be the topic of my next blog; tingly fingers which are not working properly permitting - a slightly unpleasant side effect of the chemical I had pumped into me this morning.